Nasty comments and what to do about them #Blogging #Cyberbully #AmReading

It’s Friday, which means it’s time for a fun post. Unfortunately, not everything in life is fun and, in fact, a whole bunch of stuff is decidedly not fun. So, I thought I’d take this day to talk about something unfun with which I could use some help. I can totally admit I don’t know everything and do need help sometimes. Not that I always listen but, anyway, let’s get to the heart of the matter.

In addition to this blog, I have another blog (Readsalot) which has the sole purpose of promoting other (indie) writers. I try to promote books and writers who I believe my readers will enjoy. Of course, I also look for authors who I think have it going on – covers that look professional, well-written and typo-free synopses, etc. But now I’ve run into a problem I don’t know how to handle.

I share my blog postings on my Facebook Readsalot page as well (because I’m awesome like that). On a Facebook post promoting a book, someone commented: “Shit book. Not even worth the cup of coffee it sits under.” Um… what?

I wasn’t sure what to do and as it was 6 o’clock in the morning and the comment had been there all night, I was a bit panicked that I needed to do something – right now. But what? Luckily, my husband lives in a time zone that’s two hours ahead of mine (and he often has early flights so I can totally bug him at 4 a.m. if I want). My husband asked whether the comment was constructive. Nope, not at all. His answer was unequivocal. Then delete it. So, that’s what I did. I also sent a private message to the person to let him know I deleted his comment as it wasn’t constructive and explaining that the page is meant to promote others. I told him he’s welcome to comment, but comments need to be constructive.

Apparently, I’m now a liberal beaner (whatever that means) because I don’t want any nasty stuff on my Facebook page. As I promised not to get political on my blog, I’ll leave that comment right there.

I’m convinced I did the right thing. I have no problem with debating issues, books, movies, archaic tennis rules, you name it. There are those who would argue that I in fact get off on debating. But throwing out nasty comments benefits no one. Have we learned nothing from the recent elections? Oops! There I go getting political again. I think the above comment fits into the category of nasty remarks that people feel free to post online but would never say to someone in person. And that’s what it’s all about for me. If you wouldn’t say the words out loud to the person at whom they are aimed, then you shouldn’t post the remark online. End of.

What do other bloggers think? Should I allow these types of non-helpful comments?

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  1. Tough call. I actually just leave them up and ignore them. Half the time, the commenter wants a reaction that allows them to respond. Many times it’s a hope that they’re met with rage that they can use to make themselves out to be the victim. Leave it up and untouched and the comment says more about them than the reviewed item. Honestly, those who would take a comment like that seriously would probably not be interested in the book in the first place.

    1. I agree that such a comment – in an ideal world – says more about the commenter than the book. But I also know how much it hurts to get nasty comments directed at your work. I really wouldn’t have minded a negative review if it was constructive. Even something as simple as – needs editing. The struggle continues

      1. I agree that it hurts and it’s definitely one of the most frustrating parts of being an author. Sometimes a comment is made just to vent emotions and not give criticism. Seems to have become more common too. Sadly, 9 times out of 10, you end up wasting time and energy if you react. Although, there’s always the option of friends or fans reacting on your behalf. 🙂

  2. Your page, your rules. Period.

    It was courteous of you to inform the commenter that you’d deleted his/her post and the reason why. It wasn’t necessary, but it was good manners; that the person responded by calling you names shows he or she lacks manners and so you shouldn’t give him or her a second thought.

  3. This issue is so sad! I count my blessings that I’ve yet to deal with this kind of garbage. I disagree about just leaving the comment there. If I’m promoting another author’s work, I’d just delete it – for the sake of that author. However, sending the boor a message was just waving a red flag in his/her face. Delete and forget it. Some people need to get a life.

  4. Now, I’m not on FB but I have rules on my blog and I moderate all comments. Our comment policy is right in our “About Me” area and it says:

    “That being said, we moderate all comments on our blog. If your comment is negative in nature and/or puts people down, your comment will not be approved or will be taken down.”

    Most of the time, the negative comments are from trolls. If it’s part of a discussion, I leave it alone.

    I agree, it was nice of you to notify the commenter. I don’t have time for that. lol!

    1. Thanks for the advice. I’m definitely going to have to put up a policy for commenting on my Facebook page. Maybe I should just be happy that people are actually visiting the page? Trying to look on the bright side.

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